One World a Letdown So Far

To be fair, this season of Survivor has a lot to live up to. The brilliance and poignancy of last season’s Good vs. Evil (or whatever they really called it) is gonna be hard to top. Battle lines were drawn with audience members, but I am (and was) quite firmly in the “religion is cool in a reality show context” camp.

I loved Brandon, I loved Coach, I even loved the eventual winner. It was all wonderful for me, almost from the first frame.

This season, dubbed, “One World,” um, not so much. In fact, almost exactly the opposite for me. The beginning of last season, sure we had a bunchy of new people, but we also had Coach’s smiling face. And Ozzy’s. And Cochran’s. And people we’d come to know and love.

“One World”? Um…  The people are uninspiring.

Then there’s the game. There is no more Redemption Island, which could be good or bad, we shall see. There are more immunity idols. OK. Good news! If you find one, you can’t necessarily keep it, which makes it more interesting.

What I had hoped for with One World is more of the promise of last season: people learning how to work together. They took steps toward that by having both teams share one beach. The teams are also divided into Men and Women. Not sure how that’s going to play out, except that so far, both sides seem really selfish and out for themselves.

It’s quite jarring to watch, after last season’s moments of peace and beauty.

Also, there was no “virtual living room” tonight. People were stupid, doing stupid, selfish things. Not sure how much more of it I’m going to watch. It’s certainly not Must Watch TV like last season was.

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Let them eat cake: the Kardashian trainwreck

We already know that the world is changing in a big way. People are marching in the streets against the excesses of greedy corrupt politicians and Wall Street types.

But let me explain a bit more the world as I see it. On the one hand, we have strong fervent intellectuals who care about each other and the environment (Michael Moore, Susan Sarandon, Tim Robbins, Angela Davis, Marianne Williamson are among those who’ve spoken at one #OccupyAmerica protest or another.). On the other side, you can pick any antagonist: the Koch Brothers; Herman Cain, bought by the Kochs; any of the Wall Street bankers who should be in jail right now; Dick Cheney, war criminal; any of countless others.

For this article, however, I choose to focus on the travesty that is Kim Kardashian. If ever there were a Marie Antoinette among the sorry lot, she is ours.

On the one side, we have people starving because they can’t find work, living on the streets because their homes have been foreclosed, unemployment’s run out and the Republicans won’t give us any more. Many millions of you can fill in this blank. It’s too sad and depressing.

But, on the other side, we have the family Kardashian, most notably Kim, who is arguably the prettiest. One might be comfortable admiring her for her beauty if only she remained quiet and didn’t wreak such havoc on our senses.

Remember back when “reality TV” started? And I mean back in the days when it wasn’t scripted, when what was happening was really real? (Only Survivor still remains so.) For the others, we have some writers somewhere coming up with grand scenarios for our viewing pleasures, to distract us from the travesties at home. The worst, the absolute worst of these (yes, in many ways even worse than the Jersey Shore nonsense and those “Housewives”) is the Kardashian clan.

I’m not sure exactly HOW MANY shows they have on E!, but if it’s even more than one, that’s too many. They just always seem to be on the channel when I skim around. Living a life of boredom and idle richness. Getting mad at a boyfriend because he playfully pushes her in the lake when she is wearing $35,000 earrings. Mindless things like that. Supposed to, I suppose, make us jealous. In fact, it makes me as sick as those Housewives do (not that I watch either, but they do cross my consciousness FAR too much).

I suppose a Kardashian show or eight would be bad enough (and it is). But the worst, the trainwreck of which I speak that makes me want to throw up as I type this is the wedding.

Mind you, the rest of the country (if I may speak for all of you here) is pretty much living frugally, scrimping, saving, trying desperately to make ends meet. We are all about authenticity. We seek transparency in our social media and government. We speak truth to each other, cause brother, that’s all we’ve got left these days.

In the Kardashian world, it’s all made-up nonsense (well, except the part about her liking the black boys). She was (that would be Kim) was flabbergasted that people who meet her on the street “actually believe” that the stories being pumped at us by E! are thought to be true. Well, yes, cause that’s the way WE live. In our own truth.

Miss Kardashian and company, who became famous solely because their father got murderer OJ an acquital, well, and maybe because she has a nice butt, live in the Land of Denial. Everything is fake. Her nails, her scenarios and, as it turns out, her boyfriends and husbands.

Now, for those blissfully living in other countries, and missing all this Americana, let me school you. The tabloid-trash TV channel E! saw that Prince marries a commoner thing happening in England, and decided it wanted that for its very self. Cause after all, according to them (I’m so not making this up, “The Kardashians are our country’s royalty.”) Really? In what universe? Say “the Kennedys” and you could have a discussion. But “the Kardashians”? HARDLY.

Mind you, again, this is a country where people are desperate for jobs, where they know the existence of every soup kitchen just so they can get some food.

The Kardashians were gifted extravagances in the vicinity of $17MILLION + for their wedding. Kim’s wedding to some jamoke. SEVENTEEN MILLION DOLLARS and counting. (Counting because her dress was gifted, her shoes were gifted, etc.) The $17M was just for the WEDDING ITSELF.

It was a lavish spectacle of hype, which I was so sickened by, I scrupulously avoided it like the plague. But I couldn’t help being bombarded by E!’s nonstop hype-o-rama of it. Two weeks before: Here Comes the Kardashian Wedding! Only on E!
Every day: “Bet you can’t wait, the Kardashian Wedding! America’s Royalty” and blah and blah and blah some more…

The TWO DAY SPECIAL was hyped nearly every hour. TWO DAYS to broadcast this monstrousity in its entirety. This lovefest. This joining of two fame whores in splashy E! garish union. Cameras everywhere. Other fame whores in attendance, or E! stalwarts.

Chelsea Handler, who is one of the few decent things on E!, did not attend. A member of her regular troupe of players did. Cause really, who are Kim Kardashian’s actual friends? People that E! pays work just fine.

The whole wedding got me pretty steamed. Or nauseated, depending on the day.

The after-examination as E!’s other stalwart, Joan Rivers, dished the gowns of people in attendance. Oh, did I mention? Kim had THREE. THREE wedding gowns. One for the ceremony, one for the reception. I don’t even know what the other one was for. For the hop into the limo to head to the honeymoon? Who knows? Who cares? I wish I didn’t know these stupid facts. (You can imagine how ever-pervasive this nonsense had to be: I was studiously avoiding all mention of this crap, and still I gleaned bits here and there of data about it.)

But now, 73 days later, 73 days and $17M squandered later, this marriage made in TV heaven is no more. The divorce papers are on their way. And that makes me even angrier.

I was thinking of that other reality show (the only real one left), Survivor, which this season has the evil Russell Hantz’s nephew, Brandon, fighting out between Good and Evil. In interview, he said he was “trying to reclaim his family’s good name.”

Tonight, the day after the divorce announcement, the “good Kardashian”, brother Rob was hoofing out his angst on Dancing with the Stars. He didn’t say it, but he’s doing the only thing possible to “redeem his family’s good name.” Showing the benefits of actual hard work. (As his boorish, ill-mannered sisters heckle and jeer from the sidelines, there’s Rob, who feels like he doesn’t fit in with his family.) All I can say to you, Rob, is: Good thing. They make me want to throw up.

I sincerely cannot even look at any of them anymore. Please God, make them go away.

Survivor Has Found God… and Social Media

When people talk these days about reality TV, the images of Snooki making out with a girl (both drunk), or loud housewives screaming at each other in restaurants probably come to mind. But quietly, oh so quietly, the show that started it all is taking this whole concept in another direction.

Let’s for a minute revisit the old direction. Survivor started out eons ago now, with conniving, back-stabbing Richard Hatch winning its first season (you remember him, he later ended up in jail for tax evasion). Throughout its seasons, it has pretty much been thus, too. Lying, cheating, backstabbing, blindsiding people who trust you. That’s how you win.

But its strength, right from that very first episode, has been in listening. In letting people do what they do, and letting things happen. That first outburst by Sue at Tribal Council still gives me chills if I think about it. People are funny, and people will surprise you.

That is really what has kept Survivor at the top of its game all these years, and is, frankly, why Jeff Probst keeps scooping up those Emmys every year (well-deserved). They let people do their thing and they capture it on camera.

But something really significant happened last season. While there had been many backstabbing moments captured on film, this was different. These last couple of seasons of Survivor have added a new wrinkle called Redemption Island. Where you aren’t voted out immediately, you kind of go to a holding area, to fight one last battle for your survival.

The brilliant thing about this new thing is that the Survivors who get sent there are pretty much removed from all the pre-planned and produced hoopla going on with the others. They are pretty much on their own, for days or weeks sometimes.

Matt was the contestant who changed the path of Survivor. You see, Matt believed in God. Strongly. And you’d see him on Redemption Island, getting spiritual, connecting with God, then winning all these challenges. Survivor producers may not have originally planned it that way, but it turned out to be great TV.

Sometimes competitors would get to hang out for a bit, before they had to do battle. Such a thing happened with Matt and an opponent from the opposite team. They were on opposing teams on Survivor, but in the team of religion, they were on the same side. They shared Bible verses with each other, and prayed before their battle.

And here was the moment, as stunning a Survivor moment as that first outburst by Sue when she described Richard as a rat. One competitor on Redemption Island lost. Matt was left behind to fight another later. As the competitor left, he turned and gave his Bible to Matt. “You need it more than me right now,” he said. It was stunning, heart-wrenching. Poignant. Real.

Ratings gold.

And also, brought up a whole new question, one which had been bounced around, in some contestants here or there through the seasons, but usually played down. What if there was a different kind of Survivor? What if you picked people who had a very strong faith, of whatever kind? People who might play Survivor with integrity instead of the old, played-out backstabbing mold? What if you quietly, but surely, looked at the various contestants to see how they make it through their days? What types of prayers do they share? When do they call on God, and how?

And most importantly, is the structure of Survivor such that you cannot win without cheating, lying and back-stabbing? It is, after all these seasons, a thrilling question. A compelling spin on an old game.

We are two episodes into this new season of Survivor: South Pacific. Another recent new wrinkle: contestants from past seasons are brought back. Last season, two “villains” returned: Rob Mariano (who ended up winning) and Russell Hantz (possibly the most hated and evil manipulative player ever). This season, a new direction. The two brought back were known for their spirituality.

Cheerful loving Ozzy, and “Coach,” who was primarily known for meditating and doing yoga on the beach. Right out of the gate, both are molding their teams, not through sneaky manipulation (lying to this one or that), but by trying to function through integrity. Being truthful to their tribemates.

In a really bizarre wrinkle (it’s almost like a parallel-universe Survivor), evil Russell Hantz’s nephew is on the show. Except, he’s the exact opposite. He quotes Bible verse, and gets so troubled when he tells a lie that he has to blurt out the truth, sometimes at very inopportune moments. He is physically struggling with lust in Ep. 2. He endeavors to get the object of his lust booted out, since “I’m a married man. I can’t have her around.” It’s fascinating.

There are hints that in the next episode, he’s struggling with the good and bad sides of his nature.

And it’s not just these three. Ozzy, whom contestant Dawn had called “Bob Marley” just a bit earlier for his free spirit, calms Dawn down when she freaks out a bit, after realizing the tough conditions of actual Survivor. Jeff Probst (whom I take for a very spiritual man himself) always says that Survivor will “kick your ass.” Sometimes it takes awhile to see this, as contestants get emaciated and pass out, or quit. Sometimes it shows up right away.

Dawn, whom I love, cause I can relate to her so much, seems very tightly wound. Very much in control in her normal life. Suddenly in an out-of-control situation. You can imagine. But there, in a deeply spiritual moment, Ozzy the veteran, stops what he’s doing, to counsel Dawn. Tells her (what is obvious to us) that she’s “got what it takes.” (I think she’s got what it takes to win, too.)

And really, the truth of Survivor always has been that you have to push yourself to limits you didn’t know you could get through. There was a moment last season, where two tough talking chickies pulled all sorts of shenanigans, but one week of solid rain brought them to their knees. They both quit.

Since then, new rules have been put into place about the whole quitting thing. It was a Survivor disgrace. To say nothing of the thievery and pushing down people with one leg. It got very nasty. Maybe this is a karmic way for Survivor to get its good mojo back.

Other cast members have their own methods of religion or connection with the Universe. One calls upon her Native American roots, and prays to their gods. Another, a gay policeman, talks about how now he “has nothing to lose.” Each, in their own way, seems to be on a spiritual quest of some kind.

Of course, TV is about conflict, so amidst all these do-gooders, you have to have some evil. We have a poker playing pot seller (medical), a scheming selfish shrewish woman (who’s already been voted out), and maybe a couple of others. But it really looks like this season, the good guys are going to win. Or at least those connected to God. You really should watch.

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In other Survivor news, host Jeff Probst continues to push the envelope with social media. Last season, he simultaneously Tweeted to first the East Coast, then the West Coast, as each’s episode aired. It was wonderful. So far this time, he is only Tweeting for one show, but he’s also adding an element called “Tout,” where he can post video segments (answering fan questions during the commercials). It is the most effective use of social media from any show I’ve seen on TV. Great way to get the fans involved–and watching in real time.

All great reasons to tune in to Survivor: South Pacific. It’s going to be a good season, God told me so.

Why I Continue to Watch Reality Shows, Or You Can’t Fight the Future

When the first season of Survivor (the very first reality show) started, my friends here in Hollywood who write shows for a living loudly proclaimed that reality shows were taking dollars out of the writers’ pockets, and therefore, they (insert footstomp here) were not watching them! Surprisingly, many of them still have this attitude (in Survivor’s 20th season).

This week, I read an article which stated that MILLIONS of people who lost their jobs in this economic crisis were just simply never getting them back. These two items are related.

Simply put, the world is changing. You have two choices: Change with it, or die. Seriously.

You can say all day long that scripted television is better than reality television (and I would agree with that), but that won’t make the networks stop putting cheaper programming in place of it. All writers everywhere can stop watching it, but does that make American Idol less successful? No, it just makes those writers out of touch.

People can argue about how pervasive the Internet is, and how really, they still love to curl up with their favorite newspaper on Sundays, but is that going to stop the iPad from becoming a dominant way to read books or what used to be printed content? No.

So you can stomp your feet and cling to your mainstream media and outdated jobs, or you can evolve and evolve now. The Internet is where it’s at, folks, like it or not. People want media that’s better, faster and on their phone. Whatever that is, and whoever provides it.

As much as big media hates this reality, people can find just as much enjoyment (you heard me, I said JUST as much) from a YouTube video of a cat playing with yarn, or a podcast created in someone’s garage, as with whatever the Big Media is pumping at us currently.

Face it, principled writers: Dancing with the Stars is glitzy and glamourous and fun to watch. Survivor has some of the best location shooting and underwater photography on television. The Amazing Race travels all over the world, so you see cultures you’d never otherwise see. Every hugely popular reality show has good points.

This is our world now. Computerized, mechanized, at your fingertips 24/7. That is our entertainment. Those are our jobs. Come and get ’em. Or at least, quit your bitching about it. It’s not going away.